Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs were. The first man was an Engineer, the second an Accountant, the third man a Chemist, and the fourth a Government worker.

To show off, the Engineer called to his dog, "T-Square, do your stuff!" T-Square trotted over to the desk, took out some paper and a pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that T-Square was pretty smart!

Then the Accountant said his dog could do better. He called his dog and said, "Spreadsheet, show them how smart you are!" Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen, and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies each. Everyone agreed, that was good!

Yet the Chemist said his dog could do even better. He called his dog and said, "Measure, do your thing!" Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10-ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop. Everyone oohed and ahhhed and was quite impressed!

Then the three men turned to the Government Worker, and said, "What can your dog do?" The Government Worker called to his dog and said, "Coffee Break, do your stuff!!" Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate all the cookies, drank the milk, pooped on the paper, sexually assaulted the other three dogs, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for Worker's Compensation, and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave!!!!