People Watching
"Never underestimate the power of idiots working together in large
groups..."
One of following people might one day be making decisions at your nearest
hospital.
I saw a lady at work today putting a credit card into her floppy drive
and
pulling it out very quickly. I inquired as to what she was doing and she
said
she was shopping on the internet, and they asked for a credit card
number, so
she was using the ATM "thingy."
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I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into
itself and for the life of them could not understand why their computer
would
not turn on.
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1st Person: "Do you know anything about this fax-machine?"
2nd Person: "A little. What's wrong?"
1st Person: "Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say
all
she
received was a cover-sheet and a blank page. I tried it again, and the
same
thing happened."
2nd Person: "How did you load the sheet?"
1st Person: "It's a pretty
sensitive memo, and I didn't want anyone else to read it by accident, so
I
folded it so only the recipient would open it and read it."
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I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do
you need some help?" I asked.
She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote
door
unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to
a
distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?"
"Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this
remote
'thingy,'" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the
key
and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over
there and
check about the batteries...it's a long walk."
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Tech Support: "What does the screen say now?"
Person: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support: "Well?"
Person: "How do I know when it's ready?"
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Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift. One day he
was
typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of
Typing paper. What do I do?"
"Just use copier machine paper," she told him.
With that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece of paper,
Put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.
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One of our servers crashed. I was watching our new system administrator
trying
to restore it. He inserted a CD and needed to type a path name to a
directory
named " i386 ". He started to type it and paused, asking me "Where's the
key
for
that line thing?" I asked what he was talking about, and he said, "You
know,
that one that looks like an upside-down exclamation mark." I replied,
"You
mean
the letter 'i?'"
He said, "Yeah, that's it!"
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I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large motor home was
towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of
repair
and
the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked the
manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the cruise
control, then went in back to make a sandwich.
Squish Date 08/20/1998
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