5. The place kicker missed his attempt at a field goal. He was so angry, he went to kick himself and missed again.

4. "When I was a Little Leaguer I had trouble putting on my helmet because I couldn't get my ears through those little holes."

3. A child, playing in a kids' soccer league, was asked by his dad how the game went. He answered, "It would have gone better if the other team would just learn how to share!"

2. A father watched his young son practice baseball in the backyard by throwing the ball up and swinging at it. Time and time again the bat missed contact. The boy noticed his father watching, and said, "Wow, Dad! Aren't I a great pitcher?"

1. "He's the only boxer in the history of the sport to be knocked out while shadow boxing."