Bill was a crotchety old fellow who always took breakfast with his wife. He would read the morning paper while she fumed at his neglect, and today of all days because it was their 25th wedding anniversary.

She fumed, "Bill! Put down that paper and let's talk about how we are going to celebrate our wedding anniversary today. What do you suggest?"

Bill put his newspaper down, removed and polished his glasses, stared for a moment into the distance, then said, "How about two minutes of silence?"