- Why in America do we have a general in charge of the post office, and a secretary in charge of defense?

- They say that love makes the world go around, but then so does a good swallow of tobacco juice.

- Sign seen on a plastic surgeon's window: "Come in and pick your nose!"

- You know you are a college student when you collect Taco Bell sauce to use as "salsa" on your chips and frozen burritos.