_*Splintercourse*_:
The sexual act in an outdoor setting.
(e.g., "I enjoyed having splintercourse with you on the picnic table at the Mile Marker 189 Rest Stop.")

_*POTUS Interruptus*_:
A sexual encounter prematuraly ended when the Secret Service man assigned to you hollers that Hillary has returned.
(POTUS = President of the United States.)

_*Feastiality*_:
Sexual food fetish.
(e.g., "Man, did Kim Basinger have a feastiality problem in 9 1/2 weeks, or what?")

_*Nophyllactic*_:
A form of birth control. Unlike the prophyllactic's barrier method, the nophyllactic utilizes the word "no" to avoid conception.

_*Bromo-sexual*_:
Individuals who find sex nauseating. See also: "Women I've dated."

_*Wargasm*_:
Sexual release which immediately follows a marital fight
(e.g., "I'm so sick of waking up every morning to find your bowl of Tosittohhhhhhhhhhhhs!")

_*Frommage 'a Trois*_:
Literally, this means either "grilled cheese sandwich," or "three-cheese omelette" but it has come to connote two same-sex individuals (the bread) and one opposite sex individual (the cheese).

_*Toupalactic*_:
A powerful birth control method which is based on the man wearing a wig so comical, sex is simply out of the question.