The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.
* Helen Hayes (at 73)

I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows.
* Janette Barber

Who ever thought up the word "Mammogram"? Every time I hear it, I think I'm supposed to put my breast in an envelope and send it to someone.
* Jan King

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
* Lily Tomlin

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car.
* Carrie Snow

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends.
* Laurie Kuslansky

My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
* Erma Brombeck

Old age ain't no place for sissies.
* Bette Davis

A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't.
* Rhonda Hansome

The phrase "working mother" is redundant.
* Jane Sellman

Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows.
* Jennifer Unlimited

Whatever women must do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
* Charlotte Whitton (former Mayor of Ottawa)

Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.
* Caryn Leschen

I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.
* Jennifer Unlimited

If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
* Catherine Aird

When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss...and they called ME slow!
* Kathy Buckley

Behind every successful woman...is a substantial amount of coffee.
* Stephanie Piro

Behind every successful woman......is a basket of dirty laundry.
* Sally Forth

An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing," on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly.

The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."
The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."

The Images of Mother
4 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mommy can do anything!
8 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
12 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.
14 YEARS OF AGE ~ Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either.
16 YEARS OF AGE ~ Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned.
18 YEARS OF AGE ~ That old woman? She's way out of date!
25 YEARS OF AGE ~ Well, she might know a little bit about it.
35 YEARS OF AGE ~ Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion.
45 YEARS OF AGE ~ Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
65 YEARS OF AGE ~ Wish I could talk it over with Mom.